The title of this post pretty much sums it all up.  I wish I had some exciting stories to share about what I've been up to or what cool training I've been doing.  The new book I'm writing or the super cool new job I just accepted.  None of that's the case.

It's all actually pretty sad.  I'm having a hard time staying motivated - about much of anything.  Work has completely dropped off in the past four months.  The brief success I had near the end of the year has evaporated into nothingness.  Nothing on the horizon, nothing in the pipeline.  My half iron training is moseying along.  I don't have awesome stats to post because my training hasn't been as intense as it needs to be.  I'm in the pool maybe once a week.  I'm running once or twice a week.  I'm still teaching spinning twice per week and I usually get a ride in over the weekend.  That's it.  That's all I am doing. July 7 just may kill me if I don't get moving more. I'm getting in 5 hours of training a week most weeks - I peaked at 12 hours one week, but geez I'm slacking.

The job stuff is still what's really killing me slowly though.  Sitting in a chair, cold calling all day (a minimum of 50 calls per day is needed for "moderate success" in this business - I'm struggling to get in 30+ calls per day), is NOT what I ever saw myself doing with my life.  I promised myself I would stay a year - a year was one month ago.  I have yet to find a love for it.  But I have nothing else to turn to.  My resume since moving to Ohio has branded me a certified "job jumper" - 6 months here, 6 months there, a year here.  It's not helping me get anything else, that much is for sure. Two degrees in hand, and I can't manage to pull in anything more than minimum wage.  Failure and I are becoming BFFs.  Speaking of BFFs, I'm pretty sure my friends are sick and tired of hearing me bitch about it, and as far as that goes, most of my friends all have pretty successful jobs.  Several of them have gone out of their way time and time again to put out a good word or help, but it has to turn into anything.  They're all busy - I'm not.  I feel lonely - a lot. A whole lot.

So yeah - I'm still attending a pity party a good chunk of the time.  Shit.  I am so tired of whining.  It seems like three years of whining (especially about job things). I'm going to wrap up for now - if nothing else but to stop the whine and cheese party.  Have a good one, all.


Katie Duffy said...

It's pity party Thursday!!!!

Hugs, hugs, hugs to you. I know it's tough and demoralizing. But it could potentially push you in the right direction.

At the risk of offering unsolicited advice, how's the spin instructing going? Is there any chance you can cobble that and team Roll and all of your other multisport endeavors into a new career track? Maybe you could be a nutritionist specializing in vegetarian endurance athletes or something!

Anyway, good luck and good thoughts to you!

Christi said...


James said...

Good luck getting out of your funk. Maybe a relaxing run will help. :)

Matthew Smith said...

Why don't you move on down to the South near me and Jenn! Then we can all play! Maybe we could find you a job that rocks your socks off.

Hang in there! Keep your chin up!