10.06.2008

A visit with the past

Saturday was an interesting day. As it was my self-declared possible last Beerfest, it was a special one. As the tickets are now $40 a pop and the cost is probably on the continued increase, and the fact that Michael and I would like to start having kids sometime in the near future (near future meaning with in the next few years) was the driving force behind this decision. But if next year’s Raleigh Beerfest comes up at a reasonable price and life decisions seem to make sense, then sure, we will go. But anyway – several people knew this may be the last Beerfest for us for a variety of reasons.

Having Ed and Amy here was wonderful. As they, too, were aware this may be our last fest, they didn’t want to miss it. Having them here made the day especially wonderful. The whole weekend for that matter, as they stayed with us until Sunday morning.

Anyway, back to Saturday. First three hours went great. Had several great beers and a few I had never tried before. I was tipsy, but not out of control. It was a beautiful day, and I was enjoying the festivities with a few thousand of my closest friends. At some point, my group decided on a mass trip to the restrooms. As I had already gone right before, I decided to stay put. I recall saying, “I will stay right here. Please come back and get me.” Well, either I moved or they did because I spent quite some time standing in that one spot. While standing in that spot, I felt a tap on my shoulder.

I turned around and saw my former sister in law, Amy. I hadn’t seen Amy for several years. In fact, I hadn’t seen her since before my ex and I separated. As I assumed that Nathaniel and I’s separation would lead to permanent dis-involvement from his family, I never contacted anyone to say "good bye" or even "I’m sorry." So for Amy to walk up and say hello to me with a smile on her face was almost more than I could handle. And in fact, it was. I balled. Like a baby. Worse – a drunken baby. A baby who had tried 30 some odd beers in the past three hours while standing in the hot sun crying type baby. Good lord – my stomach flips even thinking about it now. I gave Amy a ridiculously huge hug. I told her how I had missed them all – which is very true. I was blessed with some amazing connections through my ex’s family.

Everyone knows divorce is hard, but it’s not just because of the splitting of two people. Two families are also divided. I left behind another set of parents, siblings and even my dog. My world flipped those years ago. As did all the family members on both sides.

There I stood. Amy smiled and said that my other former brother and sister in law and their brand new twins were standing near by under another tent. I asked, “Would they mind if I said hello?” Geez. I was a blubbering wreck. I went over and said hello – they looked at me and said hello. I was drunk. Great. Totally how you want to see your former inlaws. I gave hugs and said congratulations. I said I was very happy and recently married. They asked where my husband was and I had to reply that I had no idea – I had lost him about 30 minutes or so before. Right about that time my phone rang. It was my husband. I said my goodbyes to my former family and again gave huge hugs – ridiculously tipsy and probably too long hugs.

Recalling the events the next day, and even now, I feel slightly embarrassed. The crying was way over the top – but I’m an emotional person and sometimes that happens. But their friendliness and welcoming towards me was positively wonderful. Thank you so much for your kindness. Then and now.

And to recover from the incident, I had a few more beer samples under the tents. Bad idea. I spent a good chunk of the next several hours curled up in bed. At least I went out with a bang!

2 comments:

Mrs. B said...

Your hugs were most definitely not over the top. They were most welcomed and felt good.

I am grateful that both you and N were able to move on and find happiness with others that you were meant to be with. It all turned out, in the end, to be life's plan.

I wish you, and your new husband, family and friends, all the best in the world.

Ciao, Bella!

E.

Shannon said...

I could not concur enough with Amy's (as always) heartfelt and well-said comments!!! Please give me a call when you feel like punting work for a while and the girls and I will come and have a coffee with you to continue catching up in a non-altered state!!! It is only a couple of minutes from the house, and they love getting out!!! Check out our blog at thornnc.blogspot.com!!!